“A woman’s heart should be so hidden in God, that a man has to seek Him just to find her.”
– Max Lucado
When I first read this quote in 2011, it was really a defining moment for me. This made so much sense and gave me so much hope. It also made me realize I was spending my “waiting time” focused on who I was waiting for instead of who was sending him to me.
I was the girl who knew what color scheme I wanted for my wedding day way before I even had a man. I wanted the hearts and flowers kind of love, the passionate, all-consuming love. During this time in my life, I had recently met a woman who offered to mentor me through my church. As she walked with me on my journey, she spent a lot of time pouring God’s word into my life. One assignment she gave me was to study Psalm 139 and write down what God says about me in this scripture. To some, it may seem to be a small thing, but I needed it. This time in scripture reminded me of God’s power, and it gave me so much peace. A fire was ignited inside me that day. I wanted to fully appreciate and be present in my current season: singleness. I wanted to be truly happy and content by myself and receive what God had for me on my single walk.
Now this was a difficult season for me; I was tired of waiting and tired of being lonely. At the time, I felt incomplete, but God showed me that only He could make me whole. I realized that until I sought Him and allowed Him to shed light onto my dark places, I would not be ready. So, I decided to do some work while I waited. I wanted to know Him deeper so that I could know myself better and live in His will. What followed was a road that led to healing, redemption, self-discovery, and deliverance. I studied scriptures that talked about our identities in Christ; I joined a small group Bible study; I chased after God. I also started praying for my husband and his journey. Anything I could think of, I prayed for. I covered him in prayer the way I wanted to be covered, even though we had yet to meet.
In early 2012, my mom begged me to try online dating, but I was very against it. I had an idea in my head about how I wanted to meet my Adam, and it did not include a computer. I did it anyway (my mom is very convincing). I was on the site for five months before I met my husband. At the time, I wasn’t having much luck, so I logged on to delete my account and came across his message. I sent up a prayer asking for God to keep him from writing back if my time was going to be wasted before I responded to his message. He wrote back within two minutes, and a friendship was born. Needless to say, God had answered my long-awaited prayer—he was the one, and in 2015, we were married. There were many prayers for direction, clarity, and guidance that preceded us down the aisle. One thing is for sure, I am so glad I waited on God. He knew exactly who to send.
To those of you in the waiting season, here are some truths that I hope and pray encourage you:
- God’s got it, Jeremiah 29:11, Joshua 1:9
- You were made on purpose, Psalm 139
- You are special to God, 1 peter 2:9
- With God, there is always hope, Isaiah 40:31
- You are made new in God, through Christ, 2 Corinthians 5:12-21
- God keeps His promises, Number 23:19, 1 Thessalonians 5:24
Whether your wait is ten weeks or two years, remember that God makes no mistakes and His timing is perfect. He knows when your time is coming and why it is not upon you yet. I encourage you to seek Him, ask Him to show Himself to you more fully and give clarity and direction. My journey was not easy, but it was worth it. I learned that I was not the only one who had to wait, so did my husband. Knowing this gave me comfort. Realizing that he also had trials to walk through helped me to appreciate the wait all the more. You never know what God is keeping you from having to go through or deal with, so don’t rush. We often get ourselves into unnecessary situations by trying to carry our problems alone instead of leaving them at the altar. God knows your struggle, He sees your frustration, and He hears your cries. Be encouraged because God is faithful. Be confident because you were made on purpose. Know that your Father in Heaven has your best interest at the forefront and He loves you too much to give you less than His best.