Have you ever seen the movie ‘What’s Love Got to Do With It?’
Tina Turner is recognized as a woman of strength. She endured so much pain, abuse, stress and obstacles in her life but she did not give up. As in the movie, the problem wasn’t with Tina but with Ike, her husband. He had issues of being jealous of the attention she received. Ike was dealing with his own insecurities and took his frustrations out on Tina.
In relationships, sometimes the pain and hurt you experience is not because of something that we did or didn’t do. Sometimes people take out their insecurities on others to make themselves feel better. The moral of the movie is to determine what love has to do with your mate not treating you the way you deserve. Everyone deserves respect, honesty, trust, and loyalty. If your mate doesn’t respect you enough to give you these things…then it just may be time to re-evaluate your relationship.
I once was in a toxic relationship. When we first met everything was wonderful. We went out together, he went out of his way to show me that he loved me by buying me gifts. However, once we moved in together was when things begin to change. I noticed that he started to be more aggressive, more controlling, and disrespectful at times. Yes I was in love but I was shocked to know that the person I fell in love with changed. I was willing to stick with the relationship because I loved him and I believed that he would change. Months went to years of dealing with his disrespectful acts of verbal abuse and a few instances of physical abuse. I was tired of the stalking and threats. . I sacrificed going back to college, going after my dreams, spending time with my friends and family, my self-esteem, my confidence, my dignity.
I always wondered, ‘How do you hurt the one that you supposedly love?’ Not one time but over and over again. Just like Tina, I gained the courage to walk away. Enough was enough. No it wasn’t easy but it was so worth it. I needed to be happy, free, and just to have a peace of mind meant so much more to me.
You have to know your self-worth and settle for nothing but the best. You deserve it. 1 Corinthians 13:4 states that love is patient and kind. It doesn’t envy, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrong.
Love doesn’t hurt and a person should never continuously take the other for granted. Spend your life with someone that holds you down not someone that keeps letting you down.
From my experience in the relationship, I have learned to constantly evaluate who I allow in my life. This includes family and friends. I only wanted to surround myself around those with positive vibes. I will never settle or put my happiness or peace on the back burner. I deserve it.
What’s love got to do with it?
Love has a lot to do with it when it sacrifices your happiness, your peace, your dignity. Anyone can say that they love you but actions speak louder. When any of these things are jeopardized, its time to let it go!
Cassandra Goodman
Life Coach (Purpose Crusher) & Bestselling Author
Web: http://www.cassandraspurpose.com