I remember the day when everything in my life went from going good to literally everything falling apart.
After high school, I decided to go to college in another state. I was definitely not used to the freedom and realized that the adjustment was too much for me. I moved to another city in South Carolina and I decided that I would attend a local college and work. I was doing really well in fulfilling what my goals. However, my entire life changed when I let someone in that I shouldn’t have. We later got into a serious relationship and from there I became pregnant. I was in disbelief. I went into depression mode because I didn’t adhere to the standards my mother taught or wanted for my life. I was pregnant and out of wedlock. I was in disbelief because I knew that this change would put my dreams on hold for a while.
I eventually moved from where I was back to where I was born and raised. I just up and left with no plan in place on what to do from that point forward or how I would care for my unborn child. I struggled and had to do what was necessary to make ends meet and provide a life for my family.
Everyone has gone through a hard time or two but we all realize that you have to hold on and push forward. No matter what obstacles come your way; brighter days are ahead if you keep pushing. Nothing is easy but everything is possible.
I always knew that I could achieve anything. My faith is big and I knew that things may not be easy but if I hung in there that I would soon make it to where I wanted to be. Going through obstacles life threw at me, I made many mistakes. I allowed what people thought about me determine what I did or didn’t do, I allowed what people would say make me second guess myself, I allowed fear to keep me from moving forward with my goals, and I allowed people with negative perspectives on life to give me advice.
Life isn’t going to be picture perfect. Ready or not, obstacles will come. I learned that I can allow the storms of life defeat me or either I will defeat it. In all of this I learned many lessons. One is that I needed to talk less and pray more for direction instead of taking advice from others. They may not have had my best interest at heart. The second lesson learned is that the vision I had for my life everybody wouldn’t get. One of my favorite quotes states, “Don’t expect people to understand your grind when God didn’t give them your vision.” It is then when I stopped seeking advice from others. This also helped me to boost my self-confidence in knowing that I understood my purpose. I understood that everyone may not understand me but that was okay. My duty is to do whatever was necessary to fulfill my vision. I no longer would seek validation from other people. I no longer allowed anyone the power to make me second guess myself.
My turning point was the day I realized that I had nowhere to go but up. Regardless of where I was things just had to get better. Change had to happen for me and my child. I just knew that there had to be more to life and that it was up to me to create it.
There are two things that helped me tremendously on my journey. One is that sometimes you have to encourage yourself. When no one else understands you, when you have no one to talk to, and when you are feeling discouraged, encourage yourself. If you don’t, who will? I encourage myself by praying (always works), meditating, thinking less and doing more, and focusing more on my goals and worrying less about everything else going on in my life.
Second, I count my blessings and not my problems. Oftentimes, our problems are not as big as make them out to be. We enlarge our problems by how much we think about them. When you are counting your blessings, you quickly forget about your problems. You also realize how blessed you are.
Whatever life throws at you just take the hit and keep moving forward. Don’t get discouraged. Nothing is easy but everything is possible! We will not let our storms defeat us but we will defeat our storms.
Written by: Cassandra Goodman
Life Coach (Purpose Crusher) & Bestselling Author