A Mother's Heart

Walking in My Own Shoes

Before you read my bio and think that this girl has got it together, let me tell you the truth: My name is Kenyata and I am a mess! The good news is that I am also a walking message of the saving grace and love of God. I have grown increasingly comfortable with this fact after overcoming the torment of insecurity. God’s grace has allowed me to be comfortable writing about some of the struggles to encourage you to overcome yours. How did I do it? Well, first I took my eyes off of the next woman’s shoes. It is the trick of the enemy, and if you don’t stop him, he will keep you in bondage that way.

Do you ever look at another woman’s shoes and think, “I absolutely LOVE her shoes! I want a pair.” Every time I put on my favorite heels (which is just about every pair in my closet), people always ask, “How do you do it? How do you walk in those without breaking your neck?” Well, honestly, I focus on my own walk. It’s hard to put one foot in front of the other while watching the people around you walking as well. When I take my eyes off of my walk, I am liable to trip over an obvious rock or miss a step. It’s hard to be grateful for what you have while, simultaneously, looking at what other people have. We torture ourselves. We look at other people’s houses, lives, families, jobs, and talents wishing they were ours. Suzy’s kids are better behaved. Katie’s house is bigger. Mary has the newest car. You want to walk through life in her shoes. However, if you knew the story behind those shoes, you may reconsider. I can’t walk in your shoes and you can’t fill mine.

Starting my adult life as a single mom, I felt inadequate. I was always trying to measure up or “one up” the conventional household. I had to prove that society’s perceived lack in my household was not only non-existent but well compensated for. I was obsessed, like a middle school kid, with being like everyone else. What I have grown to understand about my life is that my shoes are different than everyone else’s, so I walk differently—and that’s okay.  I am extremely proud of my shoes and you should be proud of yours, too. Not everyone could do what we as single moms do regularly. What we do on a daily basis is an investment into a human-being who understands the importance of being self-sufficient because they watched you do it alone. One who values serving others and helping those in need because they saw you in need of help and learned to help you. One who has learned the art of forgiveness because (if you taught it) they had to forgive the absent party in their lives. One who learned to be selfless because that’s what they saw in you every time you sacrificed something for them. They learn to be savvy and creative because they, unfortunately, didn’t get everything they wanted and had to make what they had work for them. One who has experienced that life doesn’t always go as planned so they learned resilience.

You see, our shoes are not glamourous by any stretch of the imagination but they carve out the framework for who our kids become and the shoes they will ultimately wear. If we wear our shoes in shame, our kids miss the most valuable lessons to be taught from our struggle. They, instead, grow up with bitterness, resentment, and insecurity about their shoes. Just like your best pair of shoes, you don’t wear them for other people, you wear them for yourself to fulfill the intended purpose. Your shoes are tied to the purpose our Heavenly Father has for you. He was intentional with what He allowed to take place in your life in accordance with the destiny He has for you and your children.

Not everyone can walk in your shoes—they are difficult and sometimes painful, but they are yours and only you can wear them. You do it daily by the grace of God. You are a divine creation who has been entrusted with the shoes of your life’s journey. Your shoes were chosen for you by the same King of Kings who designed the most beautiful of creations ranging from mountains and valleys to you—you are also His masterpiece. The One who has the hairs on your head numbered, knows your thoughts before you think them, and knows the end before the chapter begins, knew what He was doing in dealing the cards of your life and allowing what He has allowed to take place. He would never put you in a position to fail. How can we not be confident in our walk and life knowing this? Who our children become is wrapped up in how we walk in the shoes that were made for us. Despite what our shoes look like, we should be confident and comfortable in our very own shoes. Your shoes will take you to the destiny that God has for you.

Until next time, pray without ceasing, love without conditions, and extend the measure of grace, given to you, to those around you! I love you, but our Creator loves you best! Be blessed!


Kenyata Lawyer is a student of life, a child of God and sister to the women of the world. She was raised in South Carolina and considers that to be her forever home. At the age of 19, Kenyata became a mother. Though difficult, Kenyata pursued her college education. In 2013, Kenyata received her B.S. in Biology from South Carolina State University; after which, she obtained a career in natural resources. Kenyata believes that her purpose on earth is to help young women overcome the adversity they may face to receive the freedom that awaits them through Christ Jesus. She hopes to uplift, encourage and inspire people with her articles. She is a living testimony and cannot wait to share her truth with the women of the world.

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. admin

    January 23, 2016 at 6:34 pm

    I am amazed at the strength and courage it takes for women who are single moms to walk in their shoes. Society says one thing but at the end of the day, we have to stay committed to walking our own path in our own shoes. I also learned that it takes away from our journey when we wish to try on someone else’s shoes aren’t tailored to fit us.

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